Harry Potter Characters and What They Should Do
by Fox of Apocolypse
Summary: This is something I thought of and with the help of Forest Stalker, it's coming along good. Pure humor. Sorry about the part at the top, I forgot to take it off. NO SLASH! These are just what I think of the Characters so far.


HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS AND WHAT THEY SHOULD DO

My best friend (Foreststalker) and I made this for our readers. Review to tell us who you would like done, who you want changed and some ideas. Thanks.

Harry Potter is awesome! And he should go out with Daphne Greengrass. Don't ask why.

Daphne Greengrass should go out with Harry Potter. Don't ask why.

Ron Weasley should loose all the money he has ever had and live as a Muggle.

Hermione Granger should go stick it.

Fred and George Weasley should bring out some new products and use them on their prat of a brother, Ron Weasley.

Ginny Weasley should find someone else to slave over. Go for Colin Creevey.

Lily Evans/Potter should also go stick it.

James Potter should get a pin and see if it'll get through his thick head.

Sirius Black should find new friends.

Remus Lupin is to quiet for his own good. He should go out with Nymphadora Tonks because they would make a good couple.

Peter Pettigrew should stop being a coward and a traitor.

Lucius Malfoy should go jump in a lake. (See Rubeus Hagrid)

Narcissa Malfoy should break it off with Lucius Malfoy before it's too late.

Draco Malfoy should look into dancing lessons.

Pansy Parkinson should offer Draco Malfoy dancing lessons.

'Lord' Voldemort should go beg for forgiveness from Harry Potter before he gets his arse kicked into the next millennia.

Albus Dumbledore should get his head out've his arse and look at reality. OR maybe its to SCARY for him!

Nymphadora Tonks should go out with Remus Lupin. They would make a cute couple. She should also choose a new favorite color 'cause pink doesn't suit her.

Mad-Eye Moody should stop being so paranoid and enjoy the rest of life. Which isn't very long, fortunately. Oh, I mean, unfortunately.

Sybill Trelweney should stop being such a morbid person. Stop predicting death! Predict LOVE or anything other than DEATH! WACK JOB!

Minnie McGonagall should stop being so uptight. Let your hair down, woman!

Filius Flitwik should grow a few centimeters taller. Or meters, his choice. He _is_ Charms professor, there has to be a charm for growth.

I have nothing to say about Pomona Sprout. Just buy some new robes that aren't filthy.

Severus Snape should stop being an arse to Gryffindor's. Also, he should wash his greasy ugly head of what looks like hair.

Cho Chang should get over the death of Cedric Diggory.

Fleur Delacour should get over herself. **sigh** 'I am _so _pretty' **sigh** (Fleur Delacour looking in a mirror.)

Viktor Krum should think about something else other than Quidditch and Hermione Granger.

Bellatrix Lestrange should go see a psychiatrist *******BOOM!*******CACKLE!******* Ok now we need to find a new psychiatrist. Oh Shit, she saw me. RUN! *******AVADA KEDAVRA! HA HA HA, HA HA HA*********Okayyy…now we need to find a new _me_. I think I left another body in here some where…here it is!

Horace Slughorn should go on a diet and do some exercise. ***Puff puff puff*** 'Oh I only walked to the letterbox and I'm SOOOO tired!'

Dolores Umbridge should go stick her head down a toilet and see where it'll take her. To see her family, I'd think? Otherwise she has no reason to stick he UGLY head down the toilet. **_Cough**Go snog Snape**Cough**_. Hm, what was that? ***looks around in mock confusion***

Cornelius Fudge should stop being such a coward and be a good Minister of Magic otherwise he should be kicked out of office and be replaced with Amelia Bones or Bellatrix Lestrange. I think she might be a good Minister of magic provided she doesn't BLOW UP THE NEXT PSYCHIATRIST! WE'RE GETTING REALY DESPERATE DOWN HERE!

Amelia Bones should be promoted to Minister of Magic if she does get chosen over Bellatrix Lestrange.

Marienetta Edgecomb should learn when to keep her mouth shut. If not Hermione Granger can put another Acne Hex on her.

Rubeus Hagrid should grab Lucius Malfoy by the neck and throw him in the lake or introduce him to Rubeus Hagrid's half brother. (see Lucius Malfoy).

Percy Weasley should get off his high Hippogriff and apologize to his family. Or maybe Mrs. Weasley might have a heart attack if he does. Good idea. I mean, _definitely_ not a good idea.

Colin Creevey should get his camera and shove it up his arse.

Stan Shunpike should look into buying acne remover. And a new accent.


End file.
